I get so tired of my mood being so easily influenced by the day to day activities: driving, chatting, reading, and not working-out.
It’s been 6 days since I worked out. I know, how pathetic is that, there are people out there that will say, “oh, yeah, well it’s been 266 days since I’ve worked out and you don’t hear me complaining!” I know. I don’t.
I’m a bit obbessed.
And yet I feel so bummed and depressed about it all. Ok, maybe not literally depressed but bummed definitly.
I actually saw my relection yesterday and felt as if my belly had grown and expanded another 6 inches in a week. Seriously. I felt fat. Instantly. I knew it wasn’t possible but because I hadn’t been to the gym in days I was “scared” into thinking I had gained it all back.
And then I started contemplating: do I work out in fear of gaining weight back, do I really believe I can continue to lose weight, am I controled by my weight loss? These are serious questions…to some.
I want to find a balance between food and exercise. I don’t want to live in an existance of extreme workouts and fatigue. I want to maintain a healthy weight loss, building muscle, and educating myself along the way on nutritional choices.
Is the, “I want” gonna get me through? I don’t know. But I do know that being able to figure out what I want is an important step. 🙂